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WHO IS IN CHARGE OF YOU?

Those of you who watched my interview yesterday on Super Soul Sunday heard me say this to Oprah about my own life — that things didn't start changing for me until I took 100% accountability for the care of my own soul. Which is to say — 100% accountability for my own life.

This doesn't mean becoming an island. One of the ways that I take responsibility for my soul is to surround myself with loving and caring people, and to reach out when I need help to the right people, the most honorable people, the most wise people. If I am the steward of this life (my own) then I must often seek assistance from those who can be of aid and comfort to me as I am trying to shape my own journey.

But ultimately, other people can only help me; they cannot save me.

My state of mind, my state of being, is entirely my own responsibility.

I spoke yesterday about the awful old question, "Who am I going to blame my life on today?" — a question which I still facetiously ask myself at times, when I find myself slipping into blame and resentment. Like: "Come on, Liz, seriously? You're still looking for somebody to pin your life on? Who is responsible for your soul? Are you seriously still putting that responsibility in somebody else's hands?"

Yes, people disappoint you. Yes, people can hurt you horribly. Yes, the world is unfair and sometimes cruel — but that has always been part of the contract. (It's not even in the small print: It's pretty much the bold print headline of the contract.) The world never pretended or promised anyone that it would not sometimes be terribly unfair and cruel (or at least that it would not sometimes be utterly incomprehensible.)

Still: Who is charge of YOU?

This is the question that drove me on my Eat Pray Love journey, and it is the question that drives me still. I ask myself this question every single day of my life, and the answer is always the same:

I am in charge of me.

What other choice is there? Sure, there are other choices, but they are all pretty terrible, and they all end in weakness and in tears.

You may have also heard me say yesterday, "No happiness without self-accontabilty."

I have never met a happy person who did not hold themselves 100% accountable for their own self.

Because that is where your dignity will be found.

When I slip on my self-accountabilty, the results are always the same: Sorrow, anger, resentment, blame, bitterness, retribution, chaos, self-pity, helplessness, conflict, shame.

So I ask myself over and over again in those messy situations: Who is in charge of YOU, Liz?

And somewhere deep inside, the best and wisest part of me always rises up and says, "I am."

Thank God.

Onward,
LG

via Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook Wall

Five minutes till Super Soul Sunday, everyone!

See you there for Part 2 of my interview with Oprah!

(You can watch it on OWN-TV, or you can LIVESTREAM it right here: https://ift.tt/1lqTLPW)

I'll be live tweeting from my Twitter handle: https://ift.tt/1cJMtUe

And I'll try to respond to your comments here, too!

MULTI-TASKING THE SOCIAL MEDIA TODAY, DEAR ONES!

🙂
LG

via Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook Wall

RISE, RISE, RISE!

Dear Ones —

The second part of my Super Soul Sunday interview will be airing today at 11am EST on OWN-TV (or LIVESTREAMING on Oprah.com, and on the Super Soul Sunday Facebook page.)

See you there! (And I will be live-tweeting along with Oprah herself, using #supersoulsunday, from my Twitter account, which is Elizabeth Gilbert

Lastly, if anyone missed Part 1 of the interview, and wants to watch, here is the full episode, from last week:

https://ift.tt/1uVvabT

(The quote below comes from my interview last week.)

Lots of love, all!

Don't forget to rise,
LG

via Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook Wall

THE VOICE OF GRACE.

Dear Ones –

Here's the thing about our heads: They are sometimes madhouses filled with crazy, wild, competing voices.

We each spend our lives dealing with the imaginary internal family of identities that constitute "The Self".

We each have brave parts of ourselves, and terrified parts, and ashamed parts, and stubborn parts, and hopeful parts, and cynical parts, and ambitious parts, and self-destructive parts…and all of them have a voice. (And all of them USE that voice.)

Sometimes those voices fight. They fight for dominance over each other, and they fight for definition of The Self. It becomes a screaming match. Sometimes it's like a riot in the monkey house at the zoo up in there.

There came a time in my life when I looked at the insane internal monkey house that was my mind, and I asked, "Who's in charge here, anyhow?"

It didn't seem like anyone was in charge.

To be sure, there was a louder, bossier, more self-hating and self-judging voice within me who seemed to THINK she was in charge…or that she should be. This was the voice of supreme self-judgment. This is the voice that said, "Goddamn it, Liz — you have to do better. This is unacceptable behavior. Why can't you get your shit together? Why are you such a loser? Can't you see how much you're screwing up your life? AND ALL OF YOU OTHER CRAZY MONKEYS NEED TO SHUT UP AND LET ME TAKE CONTROL!!!!"

That voice had so much authority, because in a way she was right. (I did, without a doubt, need to get my shit together…right? And the crazy monkeys did need to shut up…right?)

So for years I thought that voice was my highest self and I listened to her…when in fact she was nothing but my high-and-mightiest self — and she did more harm to me than any of the other voices combined.

Because the problem with that voice is that she's aggressive, demanding, unforgiving, uncompassionate, and often cruel. She didn't make me a better person. She didn't fill me with light. She just made me feel more horrible about myself. And in that sense of shame and self-horror, darker impulses within me could always take over.

She made my life WORSE — darker and worse.

But in the course of my healing — through travel, prayer, meditation, therapy, self-kindness — I found an even higher voice within me.

That voice never says anything but, "You are loved."

That's the voice that's in charge of me now — above all the chaos and doubt.

That voice is Grace. Only when I found that voice within me, life began to improve. Only then, could I make the changes I needed to make, without beating myself half to death — without all the self-punishment and shame. Because that voice makes all the crazy monkeys (even the most aggressive and domineering one) lay down and go to sleep.

Because here's the only thing the crazy monkeys in the madhouse want to know: AM I LOVED?

What I want to tell you today is this: YES.

You are loved. Entirely. Even the dumbest parts of you — totally loved.

Because Grace ONLY ever says, "You are loved."

Any other voice you ever hear inside your head (especially the voice that is telling you what a failure and loser you are, and how you REALLY NEED TO GET IT TOGETHER)… that is not Grace.

A judgmental attack of any manner (upon you, or upon anyone else, or from anyone else) will never be Grace.

I was so happy to get to speak about this last weekend on Super Soul Sunday…and if you like you can watch the full episode here, if you like:

https://ift.tt/1uVvabT

And Part II of my Super Soul Sunday interview with Oprah will air tomorrow, 11am on OWN-TV (or LIVESTREAMED at Oprah.com, or on the Super Soul Sunday Facebook page.)

See you there!

Be kind to yourself in the meanwhile, OK?

Love,
LG

via Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook Wall

This is the cutest 43 second video! Oh, how I love that Oprah Winfrey….SHE has "the most goodest" energy in the world.

Quiet on the set! Elizabeth Gilbert and Oprah are headed to the stage…..

via Elizabeth Gilbert’s Facebook Wall